Sex therapy: what men and women should know

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The success of therapy will depend on your commitment to the process. If you put in the effort, you might reach your sexual goals. It is essential to know that no therapy session involves sexual activity or physical contact between the therapist and the client.


You might get the idea that therapy just isn’t for you. However, there are times when working on difficult things, such as sexual issues, needs the help of a neutral party, who is also a licensed professional. Sex therapy is like an intimacy tune-up and could be the solution you are looking for.

Have you lost that libido? Or, are you looking to spice things up in the bedroom but don’t know how to approach the topic? Maybe you would like you and your partner to have better, less, or more sex? Both men and women face sexual issues at some point. Most of these problems stem from one thing: poor communication. Many studies show that couples who communicate well have better sex lives. They don’t hesitate to ask what they want, and sex is not a taboo subject.

Not everyone is comfortable discussing intimate matters, whether or not a therapist is present. In this article, we’ll talk about how to revamp your sex life and what women and men should know about sex therapy. Let’s get started.

What is sex therapy?

This is a type of therapy that aims to help people with issues related to sexual intimacy. Derek Polonsky, a psychiatrist related to Harvard Medical School, reports that about 30 to 50 percent of individuals will have long-term sex at some point. As such, while it is not always comfortable to approach sexual issues such as not having sex, they are certainly not unusual.

Benefits of sex therapy

You can go into therapy alone or with your partner. Although many people find it difficult to open up more about sex with a professional they are not used to; sex therapy offers some of the following benefits:

  • Improves or restores sexual health
  • Help you gain more confidence
  • Allows you and your partner to communicate more
  • It helps you have a more satisfying sex life

Choose a sex therapist

A sex therapist can be a professional doctor, psychologist, therapist, or social worker who provides comprehensive counseling to people with a sexual problem. Certified therapists have a graduate degree in psychology, counseling, therapy, or a related field. They also have degrees from the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists (AASECT), whose certification must be renewed after three years.

When selecting a therapist:

Learn about the professional training of the therapist in specific areas and human sexuality. Besides, what do you prefer, a male or female therapist? While all sex therapists learn to address sexual issues that affect both women and men, some people feel more comfortable talking about their sexual issues to a same-sex therapist. Additionally, ask a potential therapist the following questions:

  • What do they consider normal about sex? You don’t want to go to a therapist with a fixed, rigid idea about sex.
  • Ask the therapist about some of his therapeutic approaches. If the therapist is only using one method, you may want to keep looking. Sex therapy cannot work with a standard approach.

What to expect during sex therapy?

Usually clients come to the therapist’s office. The length and frequency of sessions will depend on the client and the problem being addressed. It is normal to feel anxious the first time you see a sex therapist. In fact, many people feel uncomfortable talking about sex, especially with a stranger.

Happy couple. Man, woman and therapist; image by Freepik, via Freepik.com.

But, most therapists will recognize that you are struggling and will work to make you feel comfortable. Usually, the therapist will start by asking about your health, sex education, sexual history, beliefs about sex, and specific concerns.

The sex therapists assign you homework assignments. These duties may include:

  • Sensation Focus – The technique aims to help reduce anxiety while building intimacy and confidence. Couples start with non-sexual touching, move on to genital touching, and end with penetration.
  • Experimentation – For couples who feel their sex life is in a rut, the therapist may ask you to try various activities such as adjusting sex positions or adjusting the routine.
  • Communication strategies– Here you practice asking for what you need or want emotionally or sexually in a relationship. You also practice things to say during sex.

The success of therapy will depend on your commitment to the process. If you put in the effort, you might reach your sexual goals. It is essential to know that no therapy session involves sexual activity or physical contact between the therapist and the client.

Getting to Bed Common Misconceptions About Seeing a Therapist and Sex Therapy

Sex is a perfectly natural and normal part of life, and it’s okay to want support. Many people suffer from their sexuality, just as they can struggle with the direction of life and with issues such as anxiety.

Family therapy sex from a qualified and experienced sex therapist will help you have the sex life you have always wanted and deserved. Have you been to see a sex therapist? If so, please share your experience with us.


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